At
home we've been talking about the 7 deadly sins lately. They are
- Pride
- Envy
- Gluttony
- Lust
- Anger
- Greed
- Sloth
We
asked ourselves which one we identified with most. And how could we find its
counterpoint - as a conscious reminder.
- Humility
- Kindness
- Abstinence
- Chastity
- Patience
- Liberality
- Diligence
Of
course, it seems we suffer from a few of
them at different levels, but there might be one in particular that seems
stronger than the others.
I
don't want to discuss my family's weaknesses (well I do, but I don't think it's
necessarily thoughtful to them) but I will admit that my sin is 'wrath', or
anger.
I'm
not sure most people I know would agree, but I can tell you, my closest family
know it to be true. I do hold a leash on my anger, but it simmers underneath
the surface of my life in the most surprising ways.
I've
learnt techniques to keep it at bay, but honestly, it’s like a leashed animal.
That's
where identification comes in. I can identify with my anger, and it can become
me, or I can identify with the life that is NOW in my energetic body, this flow
within my soul - that is the true me and ride out the fluctuations of this
anger like a pro surfer.
That
sounds so easy. In some ways it is. I've been heading to this time and time
again. Here it is again. Commitment time. Adyashanti said he made a commitment
to himself to 'never look back' and he never did. That was it; he didn’t go
back into his previous mode of being.
That’s
where I am. Never go back.
So,
what's different this time?
- I just turned 40. It seems like a birthing into womanhood. You might think it's a bit late, but I feel it, internally, this strength of being that wasn't there before, just because of the number. No more nonsense.
- I am just coming out of 6 weeks of illness. I had whopping cough and was house bound most of the time. I'm just emerging from my cocoon now. Strong and clear in what I know to be true.
- Since the sickness I feel different. Like some of the chaff has fallen away. My life force is strong and radiant within. Stronger than ever before. Stronger every day.
- Amma arrives in about 10 days. I will spend as much time with her as I can.
- I feel a growing sense of urgency in my transformation. I feel as though it's not just me that I need to do this for. It's for everyone. The more fully awakened people there become, people who truly embody their internal grace, the better chance this world has. One person at a time. A channel of grace on this planet. It's got to make a difference and I feel this pressure building all the time. What might have been a choice is now imminent. There is no room for hesitation.
- And I received this answer in the I Ching - This is the realm of the Shaman. You have exhausted every alternative, spent yourself completely, taxed body and mind beyond your former limits. Survival and salvation lie beyond your reach now. Only transcendence to a new existence -- a higher plane of being -- will see you through. The Old You is just a dry husk. You can't return to it. Metamorphosis is the only grace offered. You can only return to your homeland as a New You.
There you go then. Nothing more to wait for. Commitment it is.
