Wednesday, September 16, 2009

The TV of the Mind


What gets the highest rating in your TV mind? What gets the most views? Are there repeats from the past that are always dependable for full concentration and energy? Is it just shoes and breasts, depending on your gender?

I was laughing at myself the other day. I was caught off guard.

I was walking down the street to the supermarket. Its a busy road. I was happy, but my happiness attracted a certain attention that I became intensely aware of. I stopped feeling happy, and became aware and sensitive and then I laughed at myself, dropped my slightly risen rib cage, let the wind shake my hair and I let it go.

I thought to myself, ha, got you.

Then I was in the supermarket and straight in front of me was the tall figure of a well built man who gave me one of those looks and I felt this creeping female power rising. I haven't felt that for a few years. The urge to become a prize worth the male’s advances.

It caught me unaware and I quickly hid behind the laundry detergent until the Spanish words had turned themselves into a soothing blur.

I walked home with a little less spring in my step, laughing a little to myself, but my mind was sharp and watchful and I remembered 'be ever vigilant'.

Watching the TV of the mind - that part is ok. But when the images give rise to that sorrow, that sensation, that coveted desire... this is the moment of test. And to watch ourselves get caught up with the tangles of the mind, and then slowly un-knot ourselves.

With gratitude to OS

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